When I say, “happy with yourself”, what I mean is learning to be happy with being ALONE. Like, you learn to be happy with being by yourself, without any other supports in the world besides the God of all! Learning to be alone without your husband, or children, or any friend around.
Just wanted to clarify that before we move on here because it might sound like I’m saying something entirely different 🙂
I can see in looking back the wisdom of God in allowing me to be married to a “Cat” like man. Cat-like humans are the type of people who literally need no one. They are quiet, shady, and stay to themselves. They are defensive, and un-open to the world around them. They don’t desire to be around lots of people. They don’t like or seek lots of attention from other people. They come around on their own terms, and leave on their own terms. They don’t need anyone. Their love is hidden usually, and they do not like to be all over you. They are secretive, and get highly offended when you try to get anything out of them! They only warm up to people they can trust, and it takes a long time to gain their trust! If you do anything they don’t like, they will BITE!
God in His loving mercy and wisdom has allowed me to be married to such a creature for many great purposes in conforming me to Christ! And one of those purposes are what I’m sharing today about learning to be happy with yourself.
I Learned To Be Happy With Myself
The Lord allowed me to be married to a man that would ultimately force me to learn how to be happy with myself. The way the Lord taught me this is through the way my husband is. It’s just the way he is. He doesn’t do it on purpose, he’s just made this way.
And the Lord took hold of my husband’s personality, and used it as a tool in His hands to teach me how to never rely on a creature, and how to be happy with myself in this world.
The Lord never allowed me to find that security that all women desire in a man. I learned through heart-breaking experience that I can’t base my happiness on whether or not my husband is right next to me all the time, or not. In the beginning, it definitely hurt, and I felt how all women feel: “entitled” to “love” from their husbands, and attention, etc.
But the day came when I saw by GOD’S grace that it was actually God’s loving mercy in allowing me to be married to a man who would never be what I wanted him to be, in order to thwart my ambitions to base my happiness on whether my husband was “there” all the time, or not.
Christ All In All
If you are married to this type of man, and have found yourself trying to fight against the designs of God in this situation, I pray you might surrender to the Lord’s loving kindness in not allowing you to be able to attain that sense of security in your husband. The Lord’s desire for all of us is that Christ will be our ALL in ALL!
Every thing the Lord allows in our life, especially what feels painful at the time, is all intended to make more room in our hearts and lives for CHRIST to be the NUMBER ONE!
That He might have the pre-eminence!!!
So at the time, when I was trying to understand being married to a “cat”, it HURT! I felt alone! Neglected! Unhappy! Discontent! Entitled to his love! And all the while, the Lord was leading me down the path to where Christ would become all and in all! And I would learn to let go of my desire in exchange for the greatest reality in the world — Christ in my heart!
Learn To Be Happy With Yourself
If you find yourself constantly trying to attain something from your husband that is just unattainable —- have a renewed mind in the Lord, and look upon it from God’s loving kindness, and see that the Lord has something much better for you in Christ!
Learn to be happy with yourself, needing nothing but what God has provided you in Christ (which is all you’ll ever need my friend)!
When you let go of your own desires, and see that it is foolish to put your hope and trust in another creature instead of in the Creator Himself, you come to know the Lord personally as you cast all your hope onto Him!
It is all a part of the Lord separating us in our hearts from this life and this world — to teach us how to be happy with ourselves. If we can’t be happy with ourselves, and NEED someone else — then it proves that the Lord does not have the number one spot in our heart. But when the Lord is number one, we have need of nothing else because He is all, and in ALL! 🙂